The Transgender Community Forum (TG Hub)

I want to start this topic about: If you get attention from a man you DO you let him know your are a trans women?

My own reply: This question can evoke quite a response, but for me the only answer is 'YES', I think it is better to let a man know that you are a transgender woman as it saves any problems later. Some trans men or women believe 'why should you tell them' but as you hear about violent episodes against trans people all the time then being upfront with people in my eyes could avoid a potentially violent situation or even just a bad experience if they dump you. Let's face it, if someone is not going to like you as a trans woman then they are not worth your time from the outset.

Please share your experiences on this post by pressing reply.

The way i see it, yes we do. The reason for it is if you go into a relationship that the person will see it as hiding or "trying to fool" them which can be tough on us as we are trying to just be ourselves for gods sake. It can be destructive that we have to come out to every partner and over time can get quite annoying and hurtful because people are so judgmental which can surpress a person into a hole of despair and self harm.

To me, either way you will hurt. You want to be you but to society, we arent "authentic".

Yes, I do, as I would also expect someone to let me know. We should always be open and transparent, as well as respectful. We should demostrate that we are proud to be transgender as part of educating society about gender.

I usually do mention it up front.  I try to be respectful of people's time and I'm brutally indifferent to what others think about me.  I was hated for being skinny, then fat, stupid, then a genius, for being a bitch of a man, and for being a jock.  No matter what I did, somebody didn't approve.  Now the only approval I need is my own and if bottoming to a non-op transgirl doesn't appeal to them - who am I to judge 🙂

   I feel it is my god-given right to show my  "  Assets  "  off to construction guys.  We have construction workers working next door to our building,  and,  I think that a little harmless flirting is exciting.  And being the trans-gender-ed girl that I am,  as long as I can get away with showing off or these guys,  I'm going to be the object of their whistles and harmless,  cheap, fantasies.

My ex-husband and i got together while i was still trying to be a boy, 40+ years ago.  He supported me through SRS, bankruptcy, homelessness and some good times too. But he recently left me for a cute Turkish boy.  While i lived alone in Turkey i met a Turkish American guy and had a fling.  He went into my office and found a proof copy of a book of TG stories i published on Amazon, figured out my TS status and tried to kill me 'for the sake of his honour'.  Now in Canada and my current guy does not yet know my history, says it won't matter anyway.  I'm about to tell him, wish me luck.

 I always let the guys know. To me it just seems the right thing to do.

I have always believed honesty is important I always mention to any guy or girl I meet it saves arguments later also the decision is theirs to make if they want to carry on with the relationship